Anyway, it was very motivating for me to blog about this talk, 'cause being awesome would be really... well... great. So, yeah... thats all I've got... a whole lot of awkward with a tiny bit of awesome.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Awesomeness
Alright, so I just saw a talk by Dennis Cass, former Carleton grad/journalist/author/blogger, about being awesome. So awesome that employers can't not notice you and give you a job. Now, Earflaps is well on the path of awesomeness. This was even mentioned in the talk.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
Doctor Dave and Steve
One particularly harsh winters eve, Retrosweater felt compelled to write this skit. She was inspired by an awesome dinner conversation with Spacesocks.
Doctor Dave enters the room
D: Oh, hello… looks down at file… Mr. Stevens
S: Yeah, you can call me Steve. Um, where’s Dr. Susan?
D: Oh well, I really couldn’t tell you. I guess that’s one of those things that’s up to your and your supposed “beliefs”… I mean, I’d like to think that it all just ends and that our bodies are simply fertilizer- to provide for the nature from whence we came.
S: OH, oh my.. she’s… I’m so sorry to hear that!
D: Don’t be sorry big smile I mean, you didn’t kill her or anything. Wink.
S: Uhhh horrified
D: Anyway, Steve, I’m looking at your file here. It seems you came in for a really bad cold?
S: Yeah, I’ve had it for weeks and was starting to get worried.
D: Well, Steve, its good that you came in.
S: Yeah? Alarmed
D sits down and leans forward meaningfully
D: Steve, now, we humans go through life never really knowing when it’ll all end and constantly fearing that death is lurking around every corner. You know what I mean, Steve?
S: Uh, I guess? Shakes head ‘no’
D: Well, Steve, you’re a really lucky guy. You now know that you have exactly five days before you.. you know? Bite the proverbial dust. Broad smile.
S: Wha- What!?
D: Now, Steve, this is no reason to panic. I’m pretty much certain that this happens all the time, there comes a time in every man’s life when he does die.
S: But… I…freaking out.
D: Now, Steve, as I see it, you have a couple of options. You could sit around and deteriorate into nothing. OR you could have the best damn week of your life! Arm punch
I mean, go out there and see what you’ve always wanted to see and try out all those sex positions your girlfriend would never let you try! Sky dive! Take all the risks you’d like to take and write some fucking letters!
S slowly gets more and more inspired. Shakes his head and jumps up.
S grabbing jacket and running out of the room: All right doc. I guess I’ll see you… never!
S starts to run off
D calling after: And I’ll see you in the obituaries!
D sits down looking pleased
Enter nurse
N: Doc, what was up with that Steve kid leaving in such a hurry? Anything wrong?
D: Well, Thelma, its just that I’m retiring next week and I thought I’d go out with a bang, if you know what I mean.
Skips out of the room.
N: Um… sure? shrugs
Doctor Dave enters the room
D: Oh, hello… looks down at file… Mr. Stevens
S: Yeah, you can call me Steve. Um, where’s Dr. Susan?
D: Oh well, I really couldn’t tell you. I guess that’s one of those things that’s up to your and your supposed “beliefs”… I mean, I’d like to think that it all just ends and that our bodies are simply fertilizer- to provide for the nature from whence we came.
S: OH, oh my.. she’s… I’m so sorry to hear that!
D: Don’t be sorry big smile I mean, you didn’t kill her or anything. Wink.
S: Uhhh horrified
D: Anyway, Steve, I’m looking at your file here. It seems you came in for a really bad cold?
S: Yeah, I’ve had it for weeks and was starting to get worried.
D: Well, Steve, its good that you came in.
S: Yeah? Alarmed
D sits down and leans forward meaningfully
D: Steve, now, we humans go through life never really knowing when it’ll all end and constantly fearing that death is lurking around every corner. You know what I mean, Steve?
S: Uh, I guess? Shakes head ‘no’
D: Well, Steve, you’re a really lucky guy. You now know that you have exactly five days before you.. you know? Bite the proverbial dust. Broad smile.
S: Wha- What!?
D: Now, Steve, this is no reason to panic. I’m pretty much certain that this happens all the time, there comes a time in every man’s life when he does die.
S: But… I…freaking out.
D: Now, Steve, as I see it, you have a couple of options. You could sit around and deteriorate into nothing. OR you could have the best damn week of your life! Arm punch
I mean, go out there and see what you’ve always wanted to see and try out all those sex positions your girlfriend would never let you try! Sky dive! Take all the risks you’d like to take and write some fucking letters!
S slowly gets more and more inspired. Shakes his head and jumps up.
S grabbing jacket and running out of the room: All right doc. I guess I’ll see you… never!
S starts to run off
D calling after: And I’ll see you in the obituaries!
D sits down looking pleased
Enter nurse
N: Doc, what was up with that Steve kid leaving in such a hurry? Anything wrong?
D: Well, Thelma, its just that I’m retiring next week and I thought I’d go out with a bang, if you know what I mean.
Skips out of the room.
N: Um… sure? shrugs
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